I was on my way home when a handsome, gray-haired man stopped me. “I’m sorry,” he said. “You’re handsome.” I’m not hallucinating. The legend has come true; My prince has arrived.
It’s the 12-year-old in me saying thank you. It’s also me now, with all the weight of my 49 years, giving him my number and telling him to text me by Wednesday so we can have dinner on Friday.
Then I tell everyone: my coworkers, La Monarca Bakery, the barista at Starbucks at Occidental, the fruit vendor on the corner of Virgil and West 3rd, and even the ahjus in Koreantown who makes Brussels sprouts for my lunch.
On Wednesday, as I wait in line at Apollonia’s Pizzeria, I realize that we’re unlikely to be eating dinner on Friday.
But around 8pm that night I get a text message. Does dinner at Sushi Gen sound good to you? Yes. Yes? Yes!
We sit in the flower boxes outside the restaurant while we wait for a table. The conversation is boring, I ask him to tell me about his life and I tell him about my job. I love my job, but I’m worried. My boss just left the company and what’s an executive assistant without a boss? Prince Charming snorts and says I’m lucky. He’s looking for a full-time job. His snoring shocked me too much to respond.
He says he thinks I’m great at my job. His best friend’s wife does the same. He’s smart. He can tell I’m not.
I think about what it means to be intelligent and what motivates a woman. Our table is convened before I have a chance to discuss the implications.
Prince Charming begins his life story right after we sit down. I don’t tell him anything about myself because he never asks or interrupts. I’ve read enough Jane Austen to know that her speech is the context for “A Very Important Announcement I Must Hear.” Here’s his big announcement: He’s been working as a driver for a car dealership from the start and is waiting for his big break. Earlier this year, he realized that show business isn’t for him. Now it’s time to relax.
Prince Charming speaks his truth with the same gravity Kevin Costner displayed when he gushed about cowboy life in Yellowstone, a show Costner declared he loved but not enough to stay. Prince Charming is sincere. It’s too bad I have trouble keeping a straight face.
I understand that we all have dreams. I once wanted to be a teacher. When that happened and after my first marriage ended, I wanted to be happy and have a job that would cover my ADHD medication and antidepressants. After my second marriage, I also wanted to feel secure, not feel hurt, and never be angry with anyone again.
I won’t tell him that and it doesn’t matter. If I had the chance, I’d still like to talk about my current life. I spend summer at the Hollywood Bowl. Winter and fall are for the LA Philharmonic, the LA Opera, and Christmas parties with friends. Many evenings are spent just lounging around the house. If I could, I’d like to tell him (and anyone in the future) that my life is as good as ever. Would he like to join me?
But my date dominates the conversation at lunch and I never talk about my past or my current life. I don’t care because the chicken is delicious and the pickle salad is perfect.
I silently think about what would happen if I got fired while he looks at me. I lost the conversation a while ago and I ask him, “Do you travel a lot?”
My question gives her the opportunity to talk about her recent trip to Vietnam. She admits that it was difficult to keep quiet because her uncle bossed people around because he had more money than them. She found it difficult to keep her mouth shut and show proper respect to her elders because their behavior was disgusting.
My interest was piqued. I also had to negotiate cultural and family expectations. I was once married to a man who sometimes hit me when he was in a bad mood. A month after I left, my sister, whom I considered my best friend, invited him to dinner every day, even though she knew what I had done. The day he kicked me out of his house when I went to pick up his son to go to Disneyland, our relationship was permanently damaged.
I understand how difficult it is to negotiate family relationships and expectations. But I won’t tell him that either. When he pays for dinner, he tips the waiters generously. I was impressed. I know, I have low standards.
There is a tea house across from the station. As we sip some matcha, he says that all he wants now is to get paid and feel good about his job. I understand. A year after leaving my marriage, I made a list of things I needed to do to get back on track, to get my life back on track. The main goal of feeling good about myself again took me about 10 years. Right now I really want this for him.
About a month later, I got a text from him asking me out. To tell you the truth, I can’t, because I’m volunteering at StokerCon, the horror literary convention.
But I wish I could send him something else. At the age of 49, I have already lived my fantasy life. I sincerely hope that he can also create the life he wants for himself. He deserves to make his dream come true. Everyone does. I should have said that.
The author is looking for a job and getting allergy shots to one day become a spinster with two cats. She lives in Pasadena. She is on Instagram: @aledmattoni
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